Breaking it down: Finally Free 10/10

Last two Sundays Pastor Tim has been focusing on James chapter 5 verses 1-9. 

From the NASB; “After these things there was a feast of the Jews, and Jesus went up to Jerusalem. Now there is in Jerusalem by the sheep gate a pool, which is called in Hebrew Bethesda, having five porticoes. In these lay a multitude of those who were sick, blind, lame, and withered, waiting for the moving of the waters; A man was there who had been ill for thirty-eight years. When Jesus saw him lying there, and knew that he had already been a long time in that condition, He said to him, “Do you wish to get well?” The sick man answered Him, “Sir, I have no man to put me into the pool when the water is stirred up, but while I am coming, another steps down before me.” Jesus said to him, “Get up, pick up your pallet and walk.” Immediately the man became well, and picked up his pallet and began to walk.

So today he talked about viewing life through a frame; creation, fall, redemption and recreation.  So God through Jesus created everything, Adam and Eve messed it up and we fell, Jesus took on human form and redeemed us on the cross, Jesus recreates us and eventually the world.

That's a lot to try and process.  I'm not even going to attempt to regurgitate Tim's sermon because quite frankly I can't.  What I can do is share with you all what I personally took away from today's message.  To do that I'm going to start with a confession: most days I feel like a fraud.  I go to church, I'm even a church member.  I teach Sunday school.  I participate in two faith based women's groups. I do my very best to uplift others through faith and perseverance.  But on the inside I feel like a fraud.  In the privacy of my own soul, where only God can see, He and I alone know the terrifying truth which is that I am an ugly human being.  Sometimes that truth suffocates me.  I get mired down in the details of what I am not doing.  I'm not praying enough, I don't read the Bible enough, I'm not discipling enough to my kids... I'm not enough.  So what happens is I get on a 'kick'.  I decide, I'm going to change "this" about my life so starting today I am/am not going to do "this."  I do pretty well for the first few days, and then I hit a speed bump and I go careening off the side of the road into a ditch.  Now I'm discouraged and I'm feeling pretty down about myself so rather than feel that disappointment and failure again I give in. 

One of the most powerful and potent things Pastor Tim talked about was the Bibles repeated reference to the power of Jesus' word.  The Bible from Old Testament to New relays to the reader that simply by speaking, the world was brought into creation.  Just by saying to the man who for 38 years lay lame and unable to move, “Get up, pick up your pallet and walk" the man WALKED.  He didn't put his hand on the mans forehead and shove him back shouting you are healed, he didn't touch him at all.  His WORDS alone created all life and restores life. 

So...Jesus is not here, walking the Earth with his disciples healing people.  However, through his disciples, he left behind a very clear instruction on how we too can be healed.  He left behind, his Word.

What I realized today after hearing all this was: #1.  I cannot fix myself through my own actions or will.  Only by submitting my will to God can I then be transformed and my actions will reflect that transformation, not vice versa.  You can't fix the body work on a car and give it a new paint job and expect the engine to fix itself with out laying a hand on it.  #2. Transformation is not a passive act.  In order to be truly transformed I need to immerse myself in Jesus' word  #3.  If Jesus can and did heal a non-believing man, what more can he do for me?

While in finding Jesus and accepting that he is in fact my savior, I am saved, that does not produce a magical transformation.  When I find myself struggling to overcome an obstacle whether it be mental or behavioral, and I'm not getting anywhere, instead of being discouraged I need to assess my process.  I also have to ask myself if I am placing a realistic expectation on myself.  That point is particularly hard for me as I am so hard on myself.  I am my own worst critic and I often have unrealistic expectations of myself.  I have to remind myself, God made me new, not perfect.  Recreation is a process.  Jesus is the process, his Word heals.  I happen to have a handy copy of his word, the Bible. Focusing on one area at a time, investing my time and energy in his word and allowing him to transform me will get me where I need to go. 

I do not have to get into the water, Jesus is the water.  Now all I have to do is pick up my pallet and walk.